Sharing knowledge from insights, past experience and academic learning with coworkers in a non-threatening way can be achieved by using influence. This method of communicating helps to prevent colleagues from taking offense to your intervention, thinking that you are telling them how to do their job or believing that you see them as incompetent and take that personally.
Influence helps others see new viewpoints and ideas. In the classic book on using influence, How to Win Friends and Influence People, Dale Carnegie shares stories that illustrate the power of influence.
Avoid Arguments
Arguing with a person you want to influence will only put a bad taste in her mouth. Avoid arguments at all cost as it is impossible to truly win an argument because if you win, they lose and that is not going to impress the person you are trying to win over!
Never Correct Anyone
Even if you are 300 percent sure that they are wrong and you are right, avoid correcting them and especially avoid correcting them in front of other people.
Admit Your Mistakes
When you make an error, own up to the mistake quickly and passionately to demonstrate that you are human. Accept that you must do whatever it takes to amend the situation.
Start Friendly
Begin every encounter in a friendly manor if you hope to win over someone especially if you are anticipating a difficult conversation.
Get them Agreeing
Start off the conversation by asking three questions that will elicit a “yes” response. This will encourage a problem solving attitude not a defensive one.
Let them Talk
To influence others, let them do the talking. It is your job to listen carefully to gain clues to their motivations and passions.
Let them Own the Idea
If you direct the conversation to plant a seed to encourage others to come up with the same idea you had, you’ll get instant buy-in.
Stay Open Minded
See other points of view and appreciate diversity. Encourage a dialogue to fully understand the feelings, thoughts and beliefs of others.
Sympathize
Offer sincere sympathy to others when they complain or share their challenges but avoid joining in on the complaining.
Appeal to their Noble Side
Appealing to a person’s interest in helping society by supporting a cause or initiative can influence tremendous buy-in.
Dramatize Ideas
The idea has to have pizzazz to really get noticed and to catch the attention of others. Look for a way to dramatize the idea to create excitement around adopting it.
Challenge Others
Appeal to a competitive nature by challenging the person you want to influence.
Using influence should not be confused with a passive aggressive form of communication. While passive aggressive communication is indirect communication, it has the intention of manipulating a situation for self gain only. Passive aggressive communication is a selfish way of communicating. Influence on the other hand is about conveying knowledge in a non threatening way to show respect for colleagues and for the betterment of all concerned.
